The Players
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Name: Kristian
Age: 24
Job: Unemployed
Description: The self proclaimed star of Random Moments. This is his universe, based on his frequent random spewings and contemplations. He considers himself classy and sophisticated. A college graduate with a degree in Computer Science, he is currently jobless, which does take a toll on his financial status. His sole source of income is scrounging around his local Goodwills in search of anything he can pawn on eBay for a profit. To make the Loser status even more prominent, he is also living out of his mom's basement. The extra time does give allow him to enjoy video games.
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Name: Dave
Age: 23
Job: C Programmer
Description: A recent college graduate (also with a CS degree), Dave was Kristian's most recent roommate. He's a drunken, ass-oholic smoker who's addicted to WoW. Even though he stumbles into overpaying jobs, he drinks through those paychecks on a daily basis. Is at his happiest laughing at the misery of others. And he will irritate you. But he's also the one who can keep his own when Kristian starts off on one of his inane ramblings.
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Name: Evan
Age: 23
Job: Java Programmer
Description: One of those Jews. Honestly, isn't that all that needs to be said? Unfortunately, he's actually a pathetic Jew. Turning his back on his heritage, Evan has no hightened financial sense or natural comedic timing. Evan was also a former roommate of Kristian during his college days. Having graduated, he's quickly become a middle-aged man, complete with fiancé and a soul-crushing office job. He was quickly assimilated by the self-aware Google.net. Recently upgraded to the new Chinese, full-censoring model.
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Name: Natalie
Age: 24
Job: Robot Engineer
Description: This girl here is the Jew's fiancé. But sssh, don't tell her father, as this would be against every Catholic and Republican bone in his body. A bizarre odd couple, she's Evan's complete opposite. Ruthless in finance and politics, she despises hippies and liberal celebrities. Her boobs are for sale though, email for current rates. She not only wears the pants, she makes Evan sew and wash them before she puts them on.
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Name: Ben
Age: 22(?)
Job: Java Programmer
Description: A college buddy of Kristian's and Evan's, Ben's finally graduated after being screwed over by professors and school administrators alike for 5 years straight. Is now being screwed over by his employer. Has recently become a big pimp with a ho in every area code.
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Name: Brian
Age: 23(?)
Job: Data Specialist
Description: One of those slimy, stoner kids that shows up now and again. Has a penchant for independent bands and even stranger t-shirts. Has run with Evan and Dave for years.
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Name: Kris
Age: 25
Job: Tech Support
Description: A chick. A chick with big boobs. No seriously, very huge boobs. For some reason, other details are fuzzy.
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Name: Ghost of Dustin
Age: 23(?)
Job: Unknown
Description: Another one of Kristian's college roommates, this kid was claimed by Marriage even before we graduated. I never saw him again. His ghost does live on however. Drops in very rarely. (Because his wife won't let him.)
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Name: Balls McBalls
Age: 1
Job: Harvesting Kidneys from the Homeless
Description: A creature spawned from Dave's snot coming in contact with Kristian's face. Has father issues. Gave up his world revenge plot for booze and hookers.
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